


A Healing Heart

by allixiler



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-14 05:01:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29786832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allixiler/pseuds/allixiler
Summary: Lucius is determined to make you feel love again.
Relationships: Lucius Malfoy & You, Lucius Malfoy/You
Kudos: 2





	A Healing Heart

Moving on is never an easy thing. After helplessly watching a once beautiful relationship spiral out of control then crash and burn is something that is always emotionally scarring. Having to build up the courage to accept the end of what you thought was your forever was a painful experience for you.

Something that almost completely ruined you.

The first few months after the breakup were messy. You spent your days crying from the time the sun rose to the time it went down. You stayed holed away in your bedroom, refusing to brave the outside world. The only social interactions you had were when your concerned friends came by your house after not hearing from you for extended periods of time. You were at your lowest, and you didn’t think you’d ever bounce back.

But eventually, you did.

After some decent time, you got yourself together and dragged yourself away from your hermit lifestyle that you had been living for the last three or four months. You had self respect and you were brave. You could get your life back together if you wanted to. You were a damn good witch, and you were wasting your talents by letting one nasty breakup get to you like this.

It was a breakup that needed to happen. It was textbook toxic and dangerous, but that didn’t make it any less hard, because it hadn’t always been that way. He was an old friend from school that you reconnected with about two years after graduation. He was highly successful, and was still as charming as he had been in his schooling years. You were smitten, and he swept you off of your feet immediately. 

The first two years were blissfully perfect. You fell more and more in love with him every day, and you were convinced that he was the one and you had found your eternal happiness. You never saw the end coming. He began to change over the course of the last year of your relationship. He became much more distant, careless, and hurtful. He had fallen out of love, but felt that he was in too deep to really do anything about it. 

Best case scenario would’ve been for him to call it off the moment he knew that he didn’t care about you the way he did before, but he didn’t. He suffered through, and eventually his love for you gradually shifted into a hatred. It was the absolute worst thing you had ever watched happen. 

His verbal abuse turned emotional, and then physical. Before long, every conversation was a blowout fight, and every touch was more of a pounding. Eventually, you hit your breaking point. You called it quits through screams and burning tears, and were never to see him again.

You had drilled the idea into your head that you’d have to learn to live feeling like you had a piece of yourself missing. You were determined to never, ever let yourself get hurt again.

You didn’t think you’d ever find love again. You weren’t even sure if you wanted to find love again. You completely closed yourself off in a romantic sense, never even giving any man the chance to make a connection with you. If you did allow them to try, you sure as hell wouldn’t let them get too close. 

A year and a half had passed since your ex had broken up with you. Your friends and family were growing more and more worried about you. They saw how you pushed away anyone who was even remotely interested in you. They witnessed how you completely shut down any time you felt a flutter of admiration in your chest. You were serious about keeping yourself guarded, and there wasn’t much anyone could do about it.

But your best friend wanted to make one last try.

She introduced you to Lucius, who had been a friend for a few years. Immediately, your friend knew that you wouldn’t be able to fight your feelings on this one. She noticed how your pupils completely blew out of proportion when you laid eyes on him. She had to hold back a smirk at how you blushed wildly at the sound of his voice. For the first time in almost two years, she saw life suddenly fill every part of you as you and Lucius hit it off tremendously. She knew that Lucius was going to be your saving grace. 

In the back of your mind, you knew you couldn’t try to brush Lucius off, but that didn’t stop you from trying. You tried not to respond to his flirtatious notions, you turned down his offers to take you on a date, you rejected him over and over again. But you noticed one crucial difference with Lucius that the others didn’t have.

Lucius was willing to fight for you.

Lucius kept popping up repeatedly in your life. You were seeing him everywhere now, and everyone you knew seemed to have some sort of connection with him. Everyone seemed to sing their praises for Lucius Malfoy, which only continued to melt the block of ice that you had frozen around your heart and soul. You knew you had to give him a chance. A fair chance. 

He had known from the beginning that you were still coming off of a harsh breakup, but he didn’t know the finer details of it. Although, he started to get a pretty good idea once you began going steady. The first few months, he noticed that you were very timid around him, but not around anyone else.

You tended to physically shy away from him when he tried to get close, or you’d suddenly grow quiet when you felt like you were talking too much. You profusely apologized for menial mistakes, and even for things that weren’t even your fault. You kept your body hidden away from him, almost always having your arms crossed in front of you or drowning yourself in layers of clothing. 

From time to time, Lucius would quickly move his hand or his arm as an involuntary response to a hot stove or something of that nature. He never missed the way you flinched and shuddered in an automatic fear response. He began to see that you had seriously been hurt, and it would take time for you to trust him. 

After about six months, he told you that he loved you. To which you didn’t return the endearment. It was a blow to his pride, but he knew it wasn’t anything personal. He told you that he loved you all the time, and you showed him that you loved him all the time. He knew that verbal return would come soon enough. He just needed to be patient.

He had never dealt with anyone quite like you. You were a new level of frightened, cautious, and insecure. He knew that patience would be key when it came to you, but he was already so fond of you, so he didn’t mind. He was meticulous and careful with everything he did with you. He’d ask for permission to kiss you, touch you, take you somewhere, etc. You accepted basically every time he asked, and even then he was extra careful not to spook you. It was a huge sign that he was really committed to you, and you slowly (but surely) began to warm up to him to the point where he didn’t have to be so overly careful.

It didn’t go unnoticed in any way. He did a silent, victorious cheer when you initiated something physical first. You had slipped your hand into his when you were walking alongside him when school shopping for Draco. It was a small gesture, but it let him know that things were headed in the right direction.

He really knew that things were looking hopeful one night in particular. Draco had left for his third year at Hogwarts, not to return until Christmas. You and Lucius had the manor to yourself for a while, and you were spending it by the fire in the large living room. 

You had snuggled up next to him, head resting on his shoulder, and you fell asleep. Again, it was something small and seemingly meaningless, but the fact that you felt secure enough to fall asleep in his arms spoke volumes. Lucius knew that you could sustain a healthy relationship. He could teach you how love is supposed to be. 

It wasn’t too late for him to show you how to love again.

You were improving and getting better with each moment you spent with Lucius. Your confidence was returning gradually, and the true you was beginning to hatch from its shell. However, there were still some days that were better than others. 

He knew that it wouldn’t be an overnight miracle. He was fully prepared and expecting for you to have your bad days. It still didn’t hurt him any less when you were having one of these days. 

You had been quiet ever since you had woken up that morning. You were aimlessly doing things around the Malfoy Manor, things that you knew the house elves were supposed to do. You would only speak if Lucius said something to you first, you kept your distance, and you were all around acting like you had a dark cloud following you.

He knew that reaching out to you was important, but he knew to mind his business when you didn’t seem interested in talking. He kept his eye on you throughout the day, but he didn’t dare push you and possibly upset you. He spotted you in the ridiculously large kitchen later in the afternoon/early evening. Your head was lowered, you were clearly doing something in front of you. 

Lucius had always had borderline silent footsteps, which was a little unnerving considering you had grown to always want to know your surroundings. You didn’t hear him enter or even approach you from behind. He rested his hands gingerly on your hips, but yanked them back when your extremely startled reaction startled him too. 

You recoiled violently, your hand spazzing and the knife in your hand falling onto the counter with a loud clunk. Lucius took a step back, his eyes wide. It had been a while since you had reacted to him touching you like that.

“I’m so sorry, [Y/N]. It wasn’t my intent to frighten you.” He said truthfully, watching the back of your head.

You shook your head, a tad embarrassed that you had reacted in such a way. You reached for the knife to continue slicing the fruit that was still in front of you. 

“No, no. It’s not you.” You replied.

Lucius briefly held a hand to his chest, feeling his heartbeat slow back down. You were really on edge today. He placed himself next to you so you could see him.

“Can I touch you, my love?” He requested.

It had also been a minute since he had to ask you, but he didn’t want to unnecessarily trigger you. You nodded, and his hand rested on the small of your back. He watched as your eyes trained on the fruit, delicately dragging the blade of the knife through the sweet flesh. He could feel the nervous tension radiating off of you, and it was killing him to know you weren’t having a good day. 

“Have you heard from Draco?” You asked curiously, ignoring the way Lucius was staring at you.

Draco had been off at school for about a month now, and you were curious to know if he had written to his father to check in. Draco didn’t really get homesick, but he would send a letter from time to time. Lucius hummed.

“I have. I received a letter from him the day before yesterday,” Lucius answered; “He asked about you.”

You stopped chopping and turned your head to look at Lucius, who was smiling honestly.

“He did?” You questioned.

Lucius hummed again.

“Yes. He’s grown rather fond of you.” Lucius said truthfully.

Draco didn’t exactly cling to you in the beginning. He loved his mother, and he didn’t like the idea of his father getting involved with anyone other than Narcissa. However, you grew on young Draco over time. He liked that you weren’t trying to replace his mom, but you were still there for him as if you were his maternal figure. He had even begun to consider you family. 

“He’s a good kid. I’m proud of him.” You smiled, but the smile faded soon after. 

You were still very preoccupied. Lucius wanted to try to extend his disposal to you again. He wanted you to be comfortable enough to converse with him when you were having problems. You had made so many steps forward together, that he hated to backtrack. 

“Is there something you wish to discuss?” He queried, pushing a stray strand of hair behind your ear.

You resumed cutting fruit, not meeting his gaze.

“I’m okay.” You lied.

Lucius could hear the slight change in your tone, a subtle sign that you were fibbing. 

“Are you certain? If there is something you want to talk about. I’m here for you.” He persuaded.

You sighed, setting the knife down completely. You felt like a broken record sometimes bringing this up time and time again. You hated bothering him with it.

“It’s just a bad day.” You said simply, knowing that he’d know what you meant. 

“Let’s talk then, yes?” He offered, whisking you away from the kitchen. 

The living room was warm as you entered. The fireplace was roaring with yellow-orange flames that were making the most relaxing sounds. You settled onto the sofa with Lucius, sinking into the cushions comfortably. His fingertips danced over your leg as he waited for you to speak. You fiddled with his other hand, tracing over his cold rings that he almost always wore.

“I think about us often,” You admitted; “We’ve been together for a considerable amount of time. I care about you a lot.” 

Lucius listened, nodding his head.

“I care about you, [Y/N]. Don’t doubt that.” He returned.

You smiled softly, but went on.

“I didn’t think I’d ever feel that way about someone ever again,” You continued; “And it absolutely terrifies me.” 

Your voice had a quaver in it now. Your throat was getting tight and you swallowed the hot rise. Tears were stinging at your eyes as you remained transfixed on his hand in your lap. He felt like this was a major breakthrough for your relationship, this was an open door that he’d be a fool not to take.

“Why is that, love?” He wondered, his heart pumping with anticipation.

You swallowed again, hard this time to hopefully keep your voice from sounding too pathetic. You couldn’t fight the crack that erupted when you responded though.

“I’m not ready to get hurt again.” You confessed, tears spilling down your cheeks when you looked into his icy, gray eyes.

If he could’ve looked into his chest, he was sure that he would’ve seen his heart stop beating. He felt horrible at your words. Had you been preparing yourself for heartbreak this entire time because that was what you were used to? It absolutely shattered him to know that you had this doubt in your head for so long. Lucius was almost speechless.

“Darling…my love, I am not going to hurt you,” He reassured; “I would never hurt you. I would never lay a hand on you in a way you don’t want. I won’t ever say the things or do the things that he did.”

You knew this, but you also didn’t know this. You wished that it were just that easy to accept that. He leisurely brought his hand from your leg to your face, swiping away the wet tracks that were now on your face.

“Lucius, I want you to promise me something. The moment that you don’t love me anymore, I want you to tell me,” You cried; “Because I don’t want to live thinking that you love me if you don’t.”

The pain is your voice was breaking him. You were so pure, precious, and golden. It was so unfair that you had to feel like this. He knew that you had been hurt, but he didn’t know you had been hurt this badly. He captured your head in his hands, looking at you with nothing much sympathy and pleading in his eyes.

“I’m never going to stop loving you. When I tell you that I love you, I mean it. I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t.” He spoke gently, but seriously.

Your sobs were his least favorite sound in the world. He never wanted to see you cry like this. 

“You really love me?” You asked, slightly craning your head to be further in his touch.

He didn’t even take a millisecond to reply.

“Undeniably. I love you. A million times over for the rest of our lives I’ll tell you that I love you.” He said, his voice thick with honesty.

You felt a warmth rush through you, and it wasn’t from the fire. You knew now that he was really in it for the long haul. He was going to be there for you through anything. He was going to love you no matter what. You kissed him in a passionate way. It was the first time you had ever kissed him first, so he was taken aback, but only for a moment. He felt your lips quiver over his, but he stroked your back to get you to stop crying. 

The words fell from your mouth so naturally. Your head did a little spin, considering you didn’t believe you’d ever say them again.

“I love you.” 

He was stunned, but overjoyed with happiness. This was a huge step for both of you. It was a magical, wonderful moment that he’d always hold on to. He pulled you in close, never to let you doubt his love for you ever again.

“I love you. Forever and ever, I love you.”


End file.
